Love and Matters of the Heart with Chinelo Udeolisa



*Unedited message*
Hi Nellly,I am in 300l. I met this guy in my year one. We dated throughout the first semester before we decided to live together as roommates, so we found a lodge and packed in. Then in 1st semester 200L we broke up but we are still staying together as roommates. After our breakup, we stopped being intimate. What hurt me the most is that he trusts me so much and is so free with me that he tells me about his new girlfriends and sometimes invite them to visit. So in a bid to feel happy, I cook up my own dating stories too. The truth is that I still love him so much but he seems to have moved on. Many people think we are dating but we are no longer dating. He no longer torches me too. Please what should I do?

Nelly’s opinion: I find your situation weird. If I got you correctly you said you guys stopped having sex after the breakup in 200l. Yet you stay in the same room and share the same bed.
Anyways, I think your first mistake was to have packed in with him. It reduced the ‘love’ you guys had. Secondly, why don’t you open up and tell him you still want him back?  He could be doing that to trigger jealousy in you. That’s my opinion shaa, but still peep in to see what G.M.A readers would say in your situation.

Please lets us advice her. If you are finding it difficult to comment with you name or nickname, then use Anonymous. Your comments would be published in 'Nelly's Corner' in G.M.A magazine.

*Send us your relationship problems: uli.gistmeansu@gmail.com 
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Comments

Paddy said…
As Nelly said, d greatest mistake you made was to move in with your boyfriend. We envy married people but we don't know what they are passing through. The truth is dat even couples hav problems, but they find in difficult to go der separate ways. This is because they are married. Its not gonna be as easy as bf's and gf's breaking up. They have committed themselves and so no going back. But as for Boyfriend and Girlfriend stuff, why should he still want to waste time with u wen he can have a million girls in a twinkle of an eye? Remember we dont tend to place so much value is something that is easily accessible. We rarely value people around us than people that are far.

As 4 d aspect of ur loving him, I'm sorry u might have lost him completely
23 August 2013 at 08:57
Unknown said…
You have made a point. We don't place much value in people we often see as long as boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is concerned. But why do you think she has lost him?
23 August 2013 at 09:01
Anonymous said…
Tell him say u still love am naa. if he no gree call me 07039263836

KONJI MASTER said
23 August 2013 at 09:11
Mr. Dulocs said…
yeah you got it right paddy, de fact dat a guy gets to see his partner(g.f) evry day on de same roof nd also lay on the same bed, is enough 4 him to get tired of the girl. Xo in my own opinion, you shuld open up to de guy nd tell him dat u still luv him den his reply will lead to ur nxt action
23 August 2013 at 09:33
C.B said…
Weird indeed. My dear, go find another bf. free that wan abeg
23 August 2013 at 09:46
Chelcy said…
Well, to move in wif your skul BF is a greatest mistake you can make....talk to him abt your feelings and if he don't wanna come back to you,then go on and live your life to d fullest...remember life goes on and feel like you guys never meet.....
23 August 2013 at 10:10
Anonymous said…
No advise. I think you just need prayers.
23 August 2013 at 10:18
unique vivi masscomm said…
Babe re u nt making things hard and more difficult for urself by still staying in d same auz wit hin, if i may guess u re d one spending more in dat rum, nelly is right abt what she said my dear b4 anytin park out from dat rum. Love is what u start and u can still stp it by urself, babe i knw it ll be hard on u bt u ve to try cos is killilin u slowing, even though u cant trust or date anyguy try and mingle wit guys, chat wit dem normal move on wit ur lyf make him jealous, start bafing up as neva b4 so dat he ll c what he miss, for christ sake u re an african women. Babe maybe d reason of d broken is for anoda beta person. I ll stp hia bt dnt forgt to park out and face ur studies.
23 August 2013 at 10:36
Unknown said…
@Konji Master You are very funny, just like your name.
23 August 2013 at 10:50
Unknown said…
Lolz, another brilliant one. I see anger in your response. But Vivi, are you saying she should forget the guy completely?
23 August 2013 at 10:55
Unknown said…
Thumbs up. I think she is not finding it easy at all.
23 August 2013 at 10:56
Unknown said…
Well I will be praying for you Dear, if not for anything, atleast so that you can find your purpose in life.
23 August 2013 at 11:12
Anonymous said…
Funny Zodi. Just ur prayers ni?
23 August 2013 at 12:59
Anonymous said…
U should'nt v moved in wif him at d 1st place,,,try finding urslf another accommodation,,if he still loves u,he'll miss u d more and u guys can start datin again
23 August 2013 at 13:02
Mimi Linda Emukai said…
"AND Y wuld u pack ur property nd follow a guy 2 his lodge?" in d name of luv nd rum mate.my fellow gals u shldn't let d tins of dis world kill us bikoooooo!
23 August 2013 at 13:03
Mr Gentle said…
My dear †ђǝ mistake has already been done , so u just settle down nd tink Δƒ wot u really want out Δƒ Ʋя failin relationship , if u loved him that much like u claim why not open up to him nd let him knw u stil feel for him , trust me maybe he feel same too , buh if he ignores u , my dear pack up Ʋя stuff nd leave Ooo , b4 him go cause bad market for u , period
23 August 2013 at 13:14
Anonymous said…
My dear the mistake has already been made so need 4 blames. U need 2 pack out of the house first then think of what u want make urself look exuisitly beautiful tell him how u feel and if it dosent work jst move on wif ur life. My dear do not allow anyone feel worthless. Take good care of urself dear
23 August 2013 at 13:31
Anonymous said…
Hahahahahaha! U foolish, no be small! Na acada u come fo ANSU abi na stupid lov? Pipul like u make we gals luk chip n stupid! End ur foolishness now by packing out imidately and facing ur studies! U wan marry tru the back door, abi? U be proper mumu!
23 August 2013 at 14:00
geena lee said…
Nelly luv wah u doin here..thumbs up
23 August 2013 at 14:23
Unknown said…
Thanks a lot Geena. God bless. You forgot to drop your advice
23 August 2013 at 14:27
Unknown said…
Lolz. Reduce your temper dear. Thanks a lot for the advice. So are you saying she should forget relationship ?
23 August 2013 at 14:29
Ezeigbo Boniface said…
Its no big deal ma dear,there stil many single guys out
there.
You can still hook up wit 1,but 1st you should not only leave
the guys rum bt pack out frm dat lodge.na u 4ck up shaa!!
23 August 2013 at 14:50
kween said…
Familiarity brings contempt! And dis is a clear example, my dear take control of ur life and move oout, d sooner d beta.if he is urs, he ll come bk 2 u.
23 August 2013 at 15:01
Anonymous said…
Snr Man..... No nid of askin u y on earth u parked into a huz wt somebody u dnt even knw wia una relationshp is takin u guyz to.... D mistake has been done and hia comes my own advce..... Dnt use because of a breakd relationshp and ruin ur future.... Dyin emotionally can afect u psychologicaly,academically, socially and oda wise..... Wat lies ahead is beta dan d past.... Park out of d huz and neva allow ur self into such a mistake again..... Our studies stil remain d paramount, any oda tin is secondary.... B wise
23 August 2013 at 15:12
unique vivi masscomm said…
@nelo yes she should forget d guy and move on wit ha lyf. she is still young and i think good lookin and attractive, moving on is her only option now. bt let d separation be on mutual agreement cos no one knows tmrw.
23 August 2013 at 15:37
Anonymous said…
Very smart line!
23 August 2013 at 15:43
Mr Gentle said…
Kelly abi na Nelly all dis advises wey u δεγ seek no go solve Ʋя matter , 1st tin to do is to leave †ђǝ Bf house , settle wif Ʋя close friend if @all u can't afford Ʋя own rent , den u tink Δƒ Ʋя life alongside fasting nd serious prayers for one good week , ask Baba God his plans for Ʋя life , weather ACADA abi na Couple life u cum school cum face .
Den secondly , try as much as possible to clear Ʋя mind Δƒ him , let him be †ђǝ one cumin after you wit enouf proof to show dat his love for u is geniune not †ђǝ otherwise, buh if he fails to do so , my DEAR continue wit Ʋя studies nd life , try nd hook up wit new friends , nd if @ all if eva fall in love again let Ʋя experience speak for u ..


****** MR GENTLE ******
23 August 2013 at 17:30
Anonymous said…
Sosi, Nelo. Some gals just dey ruffle dia parents and gals in general in the name of luv! Y on eth shud a gal live like a married woman wen she is not? Student indeed! Dis kine person go dey carry over courses, no bi small! No wahala fo relationship, but this one pass student/student relationship. Give me her papa phone number abeg.
23 August 2013 at 17:40
Oj said…
D young lady should pack away from the house or lodge. At least to salvage some self respect. If the guy loves her,he would still come back to her. An adage says that if you love something too much, you let it go. If it comes vack to you then its yours. If the guy doesn't come then its bye to the relationship. Of course the affair is not rosy again. MARTINS
23 August 2013 at 17:43
Unknown said…
Lolz. Bad market ke? She be commodity?
23 August 2013 at 18:14
Unknown said…
heheheheheheheheheheh. Babe you funny pass AY. So you need the babe papa number abi? Nice comment dear. We hope to see you around more often. Every Friday.
23 August 2013 at 18:17
Unknown said…
Thanks Kween. I am sure the babe saw your wonderful comment.
23 August 2013 at 18:18
Unknown said…
Now I understand you better.
23 August 2013 at 18:23
Unknown said…
Mr. Gentle, I am not the one your advise is directed to oooo. I am just a columnist. Nice comment though
23 August 2013 at 18:25
Anonymous said…
I will say wen a relationship becomes routine dat is 2 say no more spark nor flavour in it, it becomes bored nd d next ting, 1 bails out.esp d guys. So d ladys wen face with dis show go back refashion nd clean up. Let odas admire u nd I tell u,u guy will yarn 4 u. Bt 4 dis girl in ques nw, ma advice is get ur ass out nd fine ur own place. Stop being cheap nd dependent. MC DEPRINCE
23 August 2013 at 22:43
EZE CHUKWUEBUKA said…
Tel him ur mind....i tink he wil cum bk
23 August 2013 at 23:05
Unknown said…
MC DePrince, I respect your opinion. Thanks
24 August 2013 at 03:15
Bado said…
He ask u 2 movn wit him in d same rum n u accept r u a learner....
24 August 2013 at 09:56
Unknown said…
i dey ur back gentle....ride on
24 August 2013 at 20:44
Anonymous said…
my dear u hv made a mistake by sleeping in d same rum with him, n dat were u fuckd urself up. Pack out frm his rum first, b urself 4 some moment n focus on ur studies. Bet me if his lv 4 u is divine n nt cuboard, he wil come back 4 u. Heroine kate said.....
28 August 2013 at 23:14
Anonymous said…
hello dear,u have made a mistake of parking in with him.doh its not yet late.as it has been like dis,jst park u tins and take a wolk.u will finally see him coming for u. you no guys dont fanccy too distance relationship and too near relationship.bt still not late.jst move on wit ur life. FROM IGWE AGRIC
30 August 2013 at 16:41
Klinzy said…
No time 4 love girl, try move on with ur life joor
31 August 2013 at 01:11
Anonymous said…
funni
4 September 2013 at 10:26
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